The 5 Languages of Food

Written by: Christina LoBue, RDN, IFNCP

Posted on Jan 18, 2020

There are many facets to food. First and foremost, it provides sustenance, but it also undeniably provides human connection. Many use it as a means to convey their love and affection. After all, food is known as the universal language. Just think back to a time when a loved one surprised you with your favorite meal and how you felt by the entire experience – inhaling its fragrant aroma, savoring every bite, and feeling appreciated. Food creates powerful and unforgettable experiences.Then there are individuals who “eat to live” instead of “live to eat” and mainly value the sustenance component of food. For these individuals, they would rather receive other forms of affection as described in Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages than a complex gastronomic meal.

How to speak the best love language through food?
  1. It’s important to distinguish, since we tend to give love in the manner we receive love, but not how others prefer to receive it. For example, cooking dinner every night for your partner speaks volumes to those who value acts of service, but for others, hiring a cook to fulfill all the kitchen duties now gives you extra time to give your partner a back rub and that’s going to travel much further for someone who has a higher need for physical touch.
  2. Hiring a cook can save your family money if you tend to eat out a lot or if your food waste is high and now you can use the savings towards a family trip, which will clearly convey love to those who need quality time.
  3. For loved ones who value words of affirmation, the effort saved by hiring a cook will allow you to reinvest your energy at the dinner table into verbally expressing your love to your partner and children, including highlighting the overlooked areas in their lives where they’ve been improving.
  4. Last but not least, hiring a cook for a special occasion, such as a birthday or anniversary will scream “I love you” to someone who values receiving thoughtful gifts.

In today’s fast paced world, it’s seemingly much easier to maintain the status quo in our relationships, i.e., doing things the same way we’ve always done them, even if they don’t mean as much to our partner and/or family as it does to us. But if we stay in this position, we’re setting ourselves up for future pain, disconnection, and unhappiness, because we’re not effectively conveying love in the manner that our partner, children, and loved ones need to hear “I love you”.

What is your love language?

If you value expressing love in a manner that actually meets the receiver’s needs then it’s worthwhile to explore the 5 love languages. Here’s the free love language quiz you can take to determine how you, your partner, and children, receive love: The 5 love languages can change over time, especially in different seasons of life, so it’s worth taking multiple times.
** Note: We are not affiliated with and do not receive any financial incentives by recommending their quiz.

*Christina LoBue is an integrative and functional medicine dietitian in Northern California. She takes a holistic approach to patient care and loves helping others unlock their full potential.

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